It takes so little to make us happy sometimes

I am not a morning person. I know lots of people say this but I’m not sure how many people truly mean it the way I do. I really hate to not only get up in the morning but I hate to be awakened in the morning. If I am allowed 20 or 30 minutes to ease into the day, I can make adjustments. However, if someone wakes me up or the alarm rings and I have to jump straight up out of the bed, it literally starts my day off in a very bad way. Unfortunately, my son inherited this gene from me. This morning I was trying to wake J up earlier than usual. He squinted his eyes against the light and gave me a sour look. He turned over to go back to sleep. When I tried to wake him again, he rolled over, looked at me, and in a surprisingly sweet voice said, “The bed is the perfect place that I need to be right now.” He then rolled over and went back to sleep as if that pronouncement should end all discussion. This morning I agreed to let that be the case and he got a few extra minutes of sleep.

The other precious quote of his that I wanted to record today was from last night. I was supervising J getting ready for bed and he walked over to his hamper to drop his clothes in. He looked down into the empty hamper then looked over at me and said, “Mommy, you washed all of my clothes. Thank you! I want to give you a hug.” He ran over and gave me a big hug and kiss and thanked me again. I almost got choked up. So many thankless tasks go into keeping a house running smoothly that we often forget to say thank you to those who take care of us. I know I was likely very guilty of forgetting to say thank you to my mom over the years. I am also guilty of forgetting to thank my hubby for the numerous things he does though I do try to let him know I appreciate all he does. However, this tiny recognition of my efforts brought a little joy into my heart last night. It is good to know that I am raising a son who is thoughtful and thankful and expressive and generous with his love.

New Year's Resolutions - 2009

I won't go into a lot of detail about these now. I really just want to put them down on "paper" so I will be reminded of them frequently.

1. Establish a better exercise routine. I was actually doing pretty well with this last year until my favorite aerobics class at the gym was moved to an inconvenient time and I was left to make my own weight-lifting routine. I went some but it was intermittent and I need to do better this year.

2. Get the house ready to sell. As we look to the future and hope to move to Alabama in the next 18 months (job market allowing), I need to get some painting, organizing, cleaning, and throwing away done. I started with J's room and it has been mostly freed of old toys, clothes, and furniture. (Too bad all that stuff is now just piled up in my guest room.) But hey - J's room looks amazing and SO CLEAN! The next two rooms to tackle are my bedroom and the kitchen. It isn't pleasant but it must be done.

3. Pay down our debt as much as possible. With job security being unpredictable, I will continue to pay down our debt with any available extra money I can find. This isn't really a resolution, I guess, so much as an on-going venture. I sometimes yearn for the vacations and big screen TVs and even some smaller trinkets and treasures that I see all around me but know that the bulk of our money must go to grad school loans, mortgage payments, and private school tuition for J among other debt. It really only takes one look into little J's eyes to know why we work hard for the money that we can't even keep. We strive to make a better future for the apple of our eyes.

4. Spend more time on my hobbies without feeling guilty. I have a wonderful husband. I know lots of women say that but it is true. He will let me run off to pursue things I want to do at any time. The problem? I feel terribly guilty about it most of the time. Too much time away from home or too much money or J isn't good while I am away and I should have been there to help. Whatever the thought at the time - it is always the same outcome... Guilt. I am going to try this year to take some time just for me and not let guilt seep into my thoughts.

5. Have at least 2 nights per week and at least one weekend day per month when I do something with J - just the two of us. Whether it is sharing a meal at our local pizza joint and playing a few video games, taking in a movie, playing a board game, or visiting some of our favorites places like the Children's Museum, the Zoo, or the Botanic Gardens, I want to spend some time with J alone to bond with him before he decides he isn't interested in time alone with Mommy. Additionally, this gives Daddy some much-needed downtime and time with his friends - both good things as well.

6. Have at least one date night per month with Doug. It is very hard to carve out time alone with your spouse with a little one constantly under foot. However, while it is important to do things alone with J, it is equally important to have some adult time alone too. Even if it is just a couple of hours to go watch a movie while J is home with a sitter, it is nice to just get away sometimes. I've already planned a Date Weekend for February and arranged for all-weekend babysitting. It doesn't get any better than that!

7. Pursue new hobbies. Last year, some friends and we started a small film project. I would like to see this through with the final editing of our first short documentary this year. This will require a lot of work but it is nice to know that even as I approach 40, this old dog can still learn a few new tricks. I would also like to try some new craft projects and techniques over the next year.

8. Try to make more of my gifts I give. I love handmade gifts. These are the gifts that, I believe, truly express how much a person cares. Now, that isn't to say that everyone should make their gifts. There are lots of people who don't enjoy this sort of thing and this endeavor isn't for them. However, for me, there is nothing more personal I could give to someone than a gift I spent my time making specifically for that person. So, along with the cooperation and creative collaboration with a friend of mine, we are endeavoring to have a Homemade Christmas where a large part of the gifts we give are hand made. Now, if I can just find time to complete a quarter of the ideas we've come up with!

New Year's Resolutions - Review of 2008

Well, in looking back, I didn't comment on my 2008 New Year's Resolutions past the 6 months mark. So, might as well review those before setting new ones.

1. Start getting up earlier in the morning (ugh) to allow time for exercise and to make J a healthy breakfast. I don't know why I set unrealistic goals for myself. I am not a morning person. I am not going to exercise in the morning because I feel awful every morning and I hate to exercise. Those are two things that shouldn't be combined. However, I saw the difference last year in how I felt when I was exercising and how I felt when I wasn't. So, this year I hope to do better. As for J's breakfast, I continue to buy healthy alternatives for him to encourage him starting his day with something healthy.

2. Paint at least one room in my house (my bedroom, the guest bathroom, and/or the guest room/playroom) and hire someone to paint my kitchen. Well, Joel's bathroom was the only room accomplished last year but we did complete his room this month (with a lot of help from our very dear and overly-generous friends). I'll continue with my efforts to get the whole house painted this year with a lot of help from those same wonderful friends who have already offered to help me paint my kitchen and master bedroom next month. God love 'em!

3. Make my front flowerbeds look presentable. Mostly thanks to my dad, my flower beds look pretty great. I'll need to do a little tending and replanting work this year to keep these looking good but the amount of work will be nothing compared to last year's now that the new brick edging has been installed to actually keep the dirt inside the bed and not floating down the sidewalk.

4. Lose some weight - any amount will do. This was my bust for last year. I lost about 5 pounds all year. I really shifted this resolution about half-way through the year to a focus more on fitness than on weight loss but, either way, I think I failed. I am hoping to be more dedicated to it this year.

5. Spend more time with my friends. Game night, anyone? We have spent a lot more time with friends over the last year than in years past and I've really enjoyed it. Whether it is strategy games, board games, or dinners with our friends here or costume, RockBand, and birthday parties with our out of town friends, it is always such a joy to spend time with them, laugh with them, share with them, and grow closer to them. We've also met some new people in the last year who have become good friends as well and that is always a blessing.

From the mouths of babes

I often tease J that he is an 82 year old man in a 4 year old body. He complains of back aches to get out of going to school and claims he can barely stand up unassisted when I try to get him dressed. He also says things that no little man ought to say.
We were walking through the grocery store last Friday night when he put his hand on mine as I was pushing the grocery cart. "Mimi," he said in that sweet voice of his, "do you wish I was still a baby?" I paused a minute, considering the question. "Only occasionally," I said. "I do miss you cuddling with me every night." He thought for a moment then said, "You can cuddle with me whenever you want but time has a way of changing." He then got distracted by the vast choices in cereal and pursued a more important discussion on why I should buy some sugar-encrusted cereal instead of the one in my hand.
Another point of interest lately for me is his desire to call me "Mimi" instead of "Mommy." He started this one day after we were having a conversation about names that went something like this:

J: "Mommy, why did you name me J----?"
Me: "Well, my grandfather who meant a great deal to me AND your daddy's grandfather were both named J----. We thought it would be a good name and a strong name for you to live up to and would also honor those people we loved."
J: "I wish you had named me George."
Me: "Why?"
J: "Because I love my PaPa." (J's grandfather is named George.)
Me: "That would have been a good name as well. You are right about that."
J: "Can I call you any name I want like you called me any name you wanted?"
Me: "That depends." (I was leary at this point.)
J: "I want to call you Mimi because no one else calls their Mommy Mimi."

Seems reasonable enough. So, about a third of the time now, I am Mimi and the rest of the time I suspect he forgets and I am Mommy. It is actually quite adorable when he says it. I doubt it will last long but you never know.
It's funny to me how that little mind works. Things that just don't occur to me on a daily basis are issues of great import to him. I wish I could crawl into that little old soul and just see what's going on in that brain for an hour or two. I imagine it would go something like this with topics changing about every 6 seconds: Star Wars fight - I'm hungry - Want to watch Curious George - Can I have candy? - Why am I named what I am? - Ghostbusters! - I'm hungry - Would you please? Could you please? Please won't you be my neighbor? - Fruit Snacks! Where are they? - "Daddy!" - Where are my Batman figures I just got? - Where is my magic wand? - There's Daddy! - "Let's play Star Wars." - I want to be Peter Pan. - and on and on and on and.......

A Little Sponge

I am often astounded at how fast kids learn. One minute they are bundled up in your arms, fresh from the hospital, and the next they are writing and reading. The time flies by too quickly and yet, it makes me swell with pride.
J has always been an enthusiastic learner and yet, now that he is learning to read and write, it seems he can't learn fast enough to quench his thirst for more. He truly is a sponge just absorbing everything around him. This weekend he wanted to "play a game" with me. The game consisted of him thinking of words, asking me how to spell them, and him writing them on a dry erase board. We did this for about an hour before I had to leave to go somewhere and had to promise him that Daddy would take over where I left off.
As he learns Spanish, sign language, and computers in conjunction with reading and writing in K4, it is no secret that he will be far more educated than his parents in no time at all. I fear the day when I am unable to help him with his homework because it is just beyond my capabilities. By starting computer classes at age 2 while I started at age 15, how far along will he be by the time he reaches age 15? Also, what of the kids who aren't in good schools and don't have the advantages that he does. Do they get completely left behind when it comes time to apply to colleges and get good jobs? By the time J graduates from high school, he will have 16 years of computer classes under his belt not to mention untold hours of educational computer programs at home (even if he calls them "games" also).
It is a changing world and I am thankful J has the resources available to him to compete when he gets older. I only hope that he can look back and remember all the fun stuff as well - even if the "fun stuff" to him involves spelling words on a dry erase board. At least I bought him a dry erase board with Batman on it.